weird

I'm not sure who Leigh Lezark is but this outfit reaches new levels of awesome...when Japanese tourists look at you as if you were from planet Romulus and when even Parisian pigeons snob you, you should know your outfit is truly scary. In all fairness, Leigh was on her way to Viktor & Rolf's spring runway, and a collection fit for Pierrot the clown, was awaiting her:


You see, Lisamarie has been bugging me for a while: she does not approve of my free love lifestyle and would like to see me getting married - any guy would do, really - as long as she can wear a bridesmaid dress... and I believe I've just found the perfect bridal gown and the perfect bridesmaid outfit for her. So perfect, in fact, I'm already crying - yes, laughing hysterically will do that to you! -

This is possibly the most ridiculous bridal dress ever made.

How many collars do you need? As many as your sleeves!

I was not impressed by Prada's latest runway show for Spring/Summer 2011 - an abundance of bananas, monkeys -reminiscent of Chiquita bananas...ew! - mixed with bright colors and stripes... it's loud, and it's giving me a headache. Not to mention, the shoes are weird, and the raccoon makeup and accessories seem out of place. This collection just baffles me!

Well, too bad you've just missed them! Held in London, the Nailympics - previously called Nail Olympics- ended last week. Apparently this competition attracted 354 contestants from 24 different countries and takes place every year! It looks nuts but at least you have an excuse not to do the dishes with those things!

Clothes are so overrated, darling! And so 2009! The wig maker Charlie Le Mindu presented his Spring/Summer 2011 collection with a spectacular runway: no clothes and lots of hair. That's right, Le Mindu sent naked models down the runway. I mean so NAKED, I could see all their...ahem, lady bits which I had to cover for our North American readers (mostly for Lisamarie). After topless bearded models  at Berlin Fashion Week, we've seen full nudity on the runway yesterday... so what's next? Bearded naked models? Lady Gaga might beat them all to the punch.

A slight improvement...at least she's wearing underwear!

I'd rather go naked than wear hair! - Pictures: Tom Vandeputte via Blowpresent

Pam Hogg, another British designer, created this outfit which consists of some kind of very secure chastity belt (you'd need that for someone like Lisamarie). Again, I can make the same crap for you for a few bucks, it would make a great Christmas present! I know you want it.
After thousands of years, women have earned the right to design their own chastity belts and wear them in public without any clothes. Yay for us!

Picture: Dailymail.co.uk

We've already discussed how we feel about ugly shoes, but I could not resist sharing my latest findings after reading a great article this morning. This new shoe selection is even worse than anything we've ever posted before: aesthetically challenged AND expensive!

Louis Vuitton - Daisy Half Boots ($2,200)

Iris Schieferstein

Comme des Garçons - $743

Balenciaga - Lego heels - $4200

Nina Ricci - Heel-less shoes

Aminaka Wilmon  - Sole-less shoes

Jeremy Scott for Adidas - $240

You've probably already seen Lady Gaga's VMA pictures: the pop star was her usual crazy self. No surprise there. I try not to post about her anymore or it would become "Lady Gaga Crazed in Canada" blog. However, I had to break my self imposed ban tonight when I saw the back of Lady Gaga's meat dress... or the lack of. I didn't believe the dress was really made out of meat like her Japanese Vogue cover but then I read that it was real meat! Jesus, this woman is a bigger marketing genius than Madonna! And whoever is her makeup artist deserves an award too because she actually looked beautiful last night. That makeup artist is definitely a miracle worker!

Forget the lyrics of Alicia Keys' Empire State of Mind - these "outfits" worn during the New York's Premiere Electronic Music Festival, are so special, they look like something Lisamarie would wear on a profile picture! Furry boots, neon skirts, and even... body paint (which could be all over your body for a mere $90)! New York Magazine has even more pictures of this sort!

How many times have you heard your guy friends complain about picking up some girl at a dark club, taking her home and finding out that most of what her tank top was promising turned out to be a lie thanks to the wonder of the padded bra!  Equality has finally arrived on the bar scene - purveyors of male flesh can now also be disappointed by his (lack of) junk thanks to designer Andrew Christian who is taking male underwear to the next level with his Shock Jock Briefs which come equipped with “a soft hidden cup, sculpted into a penis shape (available in black or white models), that add around 2 inches to a guy's little (soon to be not so little) friend.  No longer will the time honoured disappointed sigh that occurs when the clothes come off be just the domain of less endowed women, now men will also be able to enjoy how it feels to really let somebody down! Power to the padding!  I haven't seen them anywhere around Toronto but you will all be relieved to know that you can pick them up online at: http://www.andrewchristianshop.com/

Guys, think how much easier (and more hygienic) this will be then shoving dirty socks, cucumbers (Spinal Tap should not be providing you with fashion tips) and other assorted produce down there!

While I was looking for a couple of YSL TV commercials I saw in France to post, I stumbled across these commercials for Diesel...Forget the "Be Stupid" campaign, here we've got a new absurd world: Assland! And before you ask, this is not the title of Lisamarie's favorite porno, it's Diesel's Argentinian campaign for 2010. Really.There is even a training video in case you'd need help to kick ass.